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Arts and Entertainment
Fall Movie Season
Summer is nice and all, what with shirtless boys, margaritas, and three months of According to Jim reruns, but eventually a guy grows tired of the endless hum of the air conditioner and breaking into a sweat every time he opens the front door. Thankfully, what gets me though the dog days is the blissful thought that soon it will be Fall Movie Season—the time of year when the studios finally release the movies with, you know, all the stories and characters. No one enjoyed the on-screen debut of Jessica Simpson or the masterful emoting of Hayden Christensen as much as I, but there are only so many explosions and car chases I can take. Where are the biopics? The Pulitzer Prize-winning novels adapted into movies that get nominated for big awards but that no one sees? Where is Kate Winslet? Where is Philip Seymour Hoffman?
Well, friends, they’re on their way. Here are some to look forward to:
Brokeback Mountain (Dec. 9) If the fact that it’s based on a short story by Pulitzer Prize-winner (see!) Annie Proulx isn’t enough to get you in the seats, then surely the fact that Jake Gyllenhaal and Heath Ledger play lovers will. (This, by the way, has led my friend Frank to refer to the movie as “Bareback Mountain.” Frank is a man of very poor taste, but that is the subject of another column.) They play cowboys!
Oliver Twist (Sep. 23) Adaptations of classic literature are usually a sure-fire way to cinematic success, but I have serious doubts this will capture the Dickensian world of vice and exploitation as well as Oliver!. On the other hand, Roman Polanski directed it and he knows the exploitation of children.
Elizabethtown (Oct. 14) Over the years, Cameron Crowe has perfected a style of filmmaking—from Say Anything to Jerry Maguire to Almost Famous—that effortlessly combines the comic and the poignant in a way that comes awfully close to a representation of everyday life. The latest stars Orlando Bloom playing a regular, twenty-first century human being. For the first time in memory, Bloom can’t get away with letting his costume do all the acting. Zing!
Jarhead (Nov. 4) Considering that the first movie he ever made was American Beauty, Sam Mendes is pretty talented. Critics are already buzzing about Jarhead, his adaptation of a Marine’s memoir of the first Gulf War that was a phenomenon when it was published right before we started the current Gulf War. Also, more Jake Gyllenhaal without his shirt on.
Rent (Nov. 23) The original Broadway cast is almost entirely reunited for what looks to be the film that Rent-heads have been waiting ten years for. I suggest watching the trailer at www.sonypictures.com/movies/rent/. It’s just enough to get you a little misty. All your reservations about Chris “Adventures in Babysitting” Columbus directing will be allayed.
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (Nov 18) As everyone in the free world knows, things get a loooot more serious in Book 4—so much so that the MPAA has given Harry and company a PG-13. The return of He Who Must Not Be Named is sure to be intense, but for my money it’s all about watching Ireland trounce Bulgaria in the Quidditch World Cup. By the way, I’m not such a dork in real life. Honestly.
A History of Violence (Sep. 23) Won the Palme d’Or at Cannes, which means you’ll like it whether you like it or not.
The Producers (Dec. 21) Personally, I find Nathan Lane to be absolutely insufferable. Millions of dollars of box office receipts say that I’m pretty much alone there, though, so you’ll probably enjoy the movie version of the Broadway smash, in which Uma Thurman will sing. Plus, $100 for a theatre tickets versus $7.50 for a movie ticket. You do the math. (100-7.5=92.50, in case you don’t have a calculator handy.)
And that’s just a sampling! So as you swelter through the 90 degree nights and soul-sucking reruns of shows that had no place being on television in the first place, comfort yourself with the thought that soon, at a theatre near you, will appear these words: Directed by George Clooney. Bring on the sweaters!
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