Gay Marriage: Nine Years in the Making
Gay Utah couples may become mutually committed if they wish, but it’s a far cry from their civil right to legally marry. Therefore, many are taking advantage of the new marriage law in nearby California. One such Utah couple is planning to get hitched in The Golden State this fall, fully aware it will not be recognized in Utah, yet feel it’s a duty let alone a desire. Steven Todd Ball, 47, and Blaine Manford Osborne, 37, agree that — though it will be a more expensive endeavor — being legally married in California is more sensible than a weak, meaningless commitment in Utah.
“In my heart it doesn’t feel right,” says Blaine referring to Utah’s Mutual Commitment Registry. “It’s putting our names on a government list that broadcasts: ‘I’m gay!’”
Blaine admits though that the registry may work for some people and that’s a good thing.
Both also agree that this will hopefully help make a difference in the gay communities in Utah and across the nation.
“If we really want to make a stand, we should do it,” says Blaine.
“If there are enough gay couples in Utah who go to California and get married, hopefully we could someday challenge the law here … and win our rights,” adds Steve.
Steve and Blaine first met in October of 1998 through a group of mutual friends. Blaine recalls they innocently fooled around on occasion, confessing it started out as a “friends with benefits” situation. Then in 1999 Steve moved to Las Vegas and Blaine was hot on his tail. After a period of time, they decided their friendship was destined to be more.
“Blaine followed me to Vegas to be my roommate, but I felt more for him than just being roommates and friends,” Steve fondly remembers.
Then one night they were at Keys and Steve says he was flirting with the bartender and when he and Blaine went home later there was sexual tension and jealousy in the air. Like a couple of shy middle school kids they asked each other that night if they wanted to be boyfriends; and now nearly ten years later they are ecstatic about the prospect of legally marrying each other.
“I love Blaine and it would just be nice to have the license,” says Steven. “A legal gay marriage is the ultimate.”
“We are guaranteed certain rights and I believe in those rights,” adds Blaine. “I love the fact it’ll be legal with Steve — it feels good.”
Their plans for California include a ceremony in San Francisco’s City Hall among their friends who wish to attend. Though their relationship has strong support from their families, they both don’t expect either side to attend.
“Our families didn’t seem to be too enthused when we told them,” admits Steve.
The couple plans on wearing tuxedos, and having a best man/best woman and lines for the ceremony.
“It’s something we respect, so we want some tradition to it,” says Blaine. “Then we’ll spend a week there, eating our way through the city and driving the coastline.”
“When we get back to Salt Lake, we’ll have a big reception with all the people we love,” adds Steve. “Then in February we’ll go on our honeymoon to Cancun or Costa Rica.”
If truth be told, the couple can’t agree on a honeymoon destination … so, congratulations, you two are perfect marriage material.
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