Gay Agenda

Most Likely A Bad Case of Poison Ivy

I’ve had a jam-packed past several days. The car I’ve had for a mere 10 months needed to have the battery and alternator replaced, and apparently a CV joint is going out. I’m in the early stages of hopefully buying my first house. And I just started a fourth attempt at quitting smoking after a 20-year addiction. So I’m a bit frazzled and emotionally unstable right now so if you happen to see me out and about, stop and give me a hug … because if you don’t I’ll write something scathing about you in the next issue. Luvs!

19THURSDAY — San Francisco aerial dance company Bow & Sparrow makes their debut in Salt Lake City. Their new tour, Helos, is an exhilirating blend of dance, circus and aerial arts. The show features indoor bungee jumping, gravity-defying dance and many aerial apparatuses. Local dancers Amanda Bennion, Kasey Lundgren, Elizabeth Stich and Nancy Carter are special guest performers.
7:30pm, through Friday, Marriott Center for Dance, 330 S. 1500 East, UofU. Tickets $20,


20FRIDAY — Many know Gary Vlasic as a treasured local artist with broad and varied experience in performance and visual arts. He has performed and directed dance-theatre since 1985. For his first solo show at Phillips Gallery, Gary creates abstract figures from collage and mixed media applied to vellum. Capturing the disturbing and beautiful, his work tantalizes the viewer with its many intricacies.
6–9pm Opening reception, regular gallery hours, through April 10, Phillips Gallery, 444 E. 200 South. Free, 801-364-8284 or

In celebration of St. Patrick’s Day the theme for this month’s Third Friday Bingo is “Potato-Palooza.” In addition to the fabulous prize packages, your “Lucky Dip” into the “Cleavage of Destiny” might just win you a 5-lb. bag of potatoes, a box of instant mashed spuds or frozen hash browns. When I sought out my destiny in Ruby Ridge’s cleavage all I got was a bad case of poison ivy and an ear infection. Go figure! Proceeds go to the Refugee Resettlement Program.
7pm, First Baptist Church, 777 S. 1300 East. Bingo Cards $5, for more info, visit their new Web site

A former tennis player, accustomed to a lavish lifestyle made possible by his marriage to a wealthy London heiress, plans what he believes is the perfect murder in Dial M for Murder. But his plans take a turn when his wife refuses to play the part of the victim. Is anyone else thinking about Michael Douglas and Gwyneth Paltrow?
7:30pm, through April 4, Pioneer Theatre, 300 S. 1400 East, UofU. Tickets $22–40, 801-581-6961 or

21SATURDAY — Yes, I know St. Patrick’s Day has passed, but the partying hasn’t yet stopped. Tonight, join sWerve for their annual St. Patty’s Day Party. It’s the biggest and best sWerve party this side of Oktoberfest. Music, dancing, green beer and ladies, ladies, ladies. Perform your best river dance for prizes … that’s freakin’ hot!
7–9pm, Club Jam, 751 N. 300 West. Suggested Donation $5, 801-328-0255, or

22SUNDAY — Well, this next event is the official notice of spring’s arrival … screw the groundhog! SkiOut Utah’s final outing of the season is David Archuleta … oh sorry! It’s their final day of X-Country skiing. So this is your last chance hopefully until next January — but more likely this October — to join this fabulous group of winter-frolickers. Don’t forget to pack a lunch and plenty of aqua. (That’s spanish for water, Gene!)
10am, Mountain Dell, lower Parley’s Canyon, I-80 eastbound Exit 134. Free,

26THURSDAY — I’m not talking about Sandyite Megan Joy, one of American Idol’s Top 13. Although Megan may too be a “sweet, unsullied” girl, I’m referring to Tanya Trucker, the favorite to win American Fork Idol. But her toughest competition, a bad boy rocker named Bo Biceps, is also the boy she wants to turn her into a tart, unscrupulous nympho. Ryan Snoozefest hosts the show, coddles the contestants and most likely wants to lick Bo’s biceps.
7pm, through June 6, Desert Star Theatres, 4861 S. State Street. Tickets $8.95–17.95, 801-266-2600 or

27FRIDAY — Talking about American Idols, our very own … meaning Utahn, not gay as a three-dollar bill, David Archuleta is taking full-fledged concert stage to appease his many tweeny girl and gay middle-aged fans. Having already three Top 100 Billboard hits, Archuleta’s sure to garner a few hundred more “crush”es tonight.
7:30pm, E Center, 3200 S. Decker Lake Dr. Tickets $25–35, 801-988-8888 or

28SATURDAY — I do “drag fabulous” at least three times a month with my friends BJ and Esteban (I’ve altered their names to protect their identity and my balls). Anyhoo, an even better Drag Fabulous is this event hosted by TransAction. The youth-led activist group, a voice for the transgender community, is looking for folks to showcase their talents or lack there of. Draggers, musicians, dancers, posers, wanna-bes, lip-syncers, etc., are wanted for this evening of talent.
7–9pm, Utah Pride Center, 355 N. 300 West. Free, 801-539-8800

31TUESDAY — Frontman Justin Furstenfeld and drummer-brother Jeremy started Blue October in 1995. The five-man alternative and experimental rock band from Texas is clearly making its way to stardom. What shines over similar rock groups is the instrumentals: The heavy electric violin and viola use in their music is incredible. With hits like “Into the Ocean and “Hate Me,” tonight’s concert should be a real moody treat.
7–9pm, Utah Pride Center, 355 N. 300 West. Free, 801-539-8800

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