Ruby Ridge

Mondays are a drag

Darlings, I can hold my tongue no longer. There is a tawdry, secretive epidemic in our community that we need to discuss. Am I referring to naked sex parties in the stucco McMansions of Sandy? I should be … but I’m not! How about conservative politicos having meth-fueled trysts via Craiglist? Provocative and compelling, yes … but sadly no. This shameful act occurs every Monday behind the closed curtains of anonymous homes in quiet suburban cul-de-sacs, where large burly men are squealing in high pitch like tween girls at the sight of Robert Patterson shirtless. The reason is gay men are flocking to viewing parties for the kitschy, bitchy, glamorfest called RuPaul’s Drag Race and RuPaul’s Drag Race Untucked (8-9:30 p.m. on Logo). And I, Ruby Ridge, approve!

As someone mildly involved in camp drag (real drag’s embarrassing relative who no one invites to Thanksgiving dinner) I really do respect “real drag” performers even though I mock them relentlessly. The drag queen contestants on Drag Race have to be multi-talented glamazon decathletes. In order to stay in the competition, these girls have to flawlessly lip-sync, model, dance, sew, blend their make-up, and avoid all of the inevitable drama and backstage politics that arise when a dozen drag queens are trapped in one room. That’s like running a marathon in a couture gown, with rabid packs of Chihuahuas nipping at your zebra-striped Jimmy Choo’s. No, darlings, this is not a contest for the faint of heart and it makes for some really entertaining television.

Logo has set up all sorts of interactive goodies online to accompany the series including fantasy football-style brackets (think tucks, not cups, and padding, not padding). I personally am hoping Raja wins because her sense of style is so different and compelling (unless she gets railroaded in one of the team challenges, which could happen). For me the rest of the contestants just kind of blend together in a glittery over-accessorized, over-waxed, blob.

But like most “reality” competitions, the best part of the show is the characters you get to loathe and cheer against. This season there was Mimi Imfurst who was delusional with a capital “D.” And close behind, in my view, is Delta Work. I know, I know, some of you love her, but she just seems petty and classless to me, and she always seems to be pissed off and scowling during the judging. But my absolute favorite playing the role of villainess is the caustic and mouthy Shangela. Oh my god I love her! Pumpkins, Shangela should be in the military, because that bitch is not afraid to throw grenades! Seriously, cupcakes, RuPaul’s Untucked would be about three minutes long if it wasn’t for Shangela running her mouth off. You know damn well she is going to be eliminated in a tsunami of drama sooner or later, but while she is on screen, Shangela is a casting director’s dream. That’s probably why they brought her back from season two. Can I get a halleloo?

Anyhow, kittens, I highly recommend you get together with friends and watch live on Monday nights, or catch up on all three seasons of Drag Race online at LogoTV.com. Once you are up to speed with those sparkling gems you can start on all the back episodes of Glee. Ciao, babies!

You can see Ruby Ridge and the Matrons of Mayhem in all of their polyester glory at Third Friday Bingo (every Third Friday of the month at 7pm) at First Baptist Church (777 South 1300 East). This month we are raising funds for the Queer Students of Color at the University of Utah (it’s for the gay children!).

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