Lipstick Lesbian

Mistletoe and that other plant

I changed into a zombie.  No, it wasn’t a costume I could change in and out of. I had turned into a full-fledged flesh-draining creature.  It was not my intention to turn into this being.

But I did set out to be something different than me and to feel different than I always do.

It started with a plant, and I don’t mean mistletoe. This plant existed in a distant Republican land called West Jordan and among a grove of trees.  My friend, who’s more than double my age, invited me to his wilderness.  Inside his house was a shack, but outside was a beautiful sight to see.  Vandalism was rampant on his property so apparently others had the same idea and even loved to camp where he lived.

He handed me a smoke and showed me how to light it up. I did as he asked so as not to be rude.  Being courteous is something I take a little bit too far.  Soon, after we set the empty wooden pipe down  I started seeing stars and trees dancing to their own tune.  I felt light-headed and full and mellow contentment. It felt like I was in my own heaven.

I forgot about my rough job managing 25 large dogs by myself.  They may be cute, but they took a toll on my body in ways I never knew possible.  It hurt like no presents on Christmas.

This certain plant might´ve been OK until I started to abuse it, and it made me not want to cope with life.  Even doing simple errands and tasks became impossible, so it was no surprise work went down the drain. I was always so tired and lethargic. I felt like I was a zombie and I started to act and move like one too.

After a family outing and watching my nieces, hyper and content, I realized I never experience that anymore.  Nor did watching them give me any satisfaction.  Joy and happiness went out the window the more I smoked up.  Plus, I was coughing more than an old man with emphysema.

Quitting gave me cold and flu-like symptoms. I was sweating, vomiting, experiencing chills and had a sore throat. But it was just part of the process and I didn´t mind.  Now I don´t worry about being mean, if I´m offered the plant, I tell them I quit and leave it at that.

I got my life handed back to me. What better Christmas present could I ask for this holiday? I can feel joy and happiness.

It’s not easy to quit cold turkey. In fact, it can be dangerous.  Seeking the help of a trained professional is recommended.

I hope everyone has the best holiday season ever, no matter their trials and tribulations.

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