Tony’s Gay Agenda
ANNUAL EVENTS
For the ride of your life, go to Q Lagoon Day clad in red (for obvious reasons). Just don’t let the following hooligans coax you into going down the Lazy River with them: Michael, Gene, Dennis, Colt, Jesse, David, Jeremy, Beau, Matt, Steve and Donna. Oh sure, you’ll come off wet but also feeling a little violated.
For a great concert experience, go to the Women’s Redrock Music Festival clad in plaid (for obvious reasons). Just don’t let the following hooligans coax you into their tent with an offering of a Natty Light tall boy: Chelle, Mer, Brenda, and Matt. Oh sure, you’ll crawl out a little buzzed but also feeling a little violated.
For a great weekend of awesome artwork, go to the Park City Arts Festival clad in only body paint. As hooligans just stay in the beer gardens so the Parkites don’t feel a little violated.
7Sunday — Q Lagoon Day
Lagoon Amusement Park, 375 N Lagoon Dr., Farmington, 11am-10pm. Discount passes available at Cahoots, Club Try-Angles, Off Trax and JAM.
12Friday — Women’s Redrock Music Festival
Robber’s Roost, 185 Main St, Torrey, times vary, through Saturday. Tickets $50-100, at the festival
— Park City Arts Festival
Park City Main St., times vary, through Sunday. Weekend passes $12/adult-$6/children (ages 6-17), at the festival
CONCERTS
From an 80s band that broke stereotypes to Michael’s foremost choice to violate on the Lazy River and from an instant sensation Australian boy band (I hope 5 seconds isn’t their holdout time on the Lazy River) to a sexy rock group that could easily coax me to ride them on a Lazy-Boy — the Utah concert stages are red hot this month.
8Monday — Culture Club
Red Butte Garden Amphitheatre, 300 Wakara Way, UofU, 7:30pm. Tickets $88-93, redbuttegarden.org
2oSaturday — Josh Grobin w/special guest Sarah McLachlan
USANA Amphitheatre, 5125 S. 6400 South, WVC, 7:30pm. Tickets $32.50-128, usana-amp.com
26Friday — 5 Seconds of Summer
USANA Amphitheatre, 5125 S. 6400 South, WVC, 7:30pm. Tickets $25-79.95, usana-amp.com
31Wednesday — Coldplay
Vivint Smart Home Arena,301 S. Temple, 7pm. Tickets $26.50-176.50, smithstix.com
THEATRE
Presented by The Neil Simon Festival, the Egyptian Theatre is home to two works being staged in repertory by one of the most accomplished and beloved playwrights. “Brighton Beach Memoirs” is a portrait of Simon’s life as a teen in 1937 Brooklyn. It’s a bittersweet story of a struggling, overcrowded Jewish household. “London Suite” is a compilation of four short stories that take place in a deluxe London hotel. There’s kidnapping, shoe shopping, Kevin Costner being a whiny betch and a bisexual man’s heartwarming plea.
Utah Repertory Theater stages the musical phenom “Cabaret” — strange that a musical about a hat could be phenomenal … wait, cabaret is a type of hat, right?? Ack! I can’t keep my mind off of riding the Lazy River with Donna.
17Wednesday — The Neil Simon Festival
Egyptian Theatre, 328 Main St, Park City, times vary, through Aug. 21. Tickets $19-35, egyptiantheatrecompany.com
26Friday — Cabaret
Black Box Theater, Sorenson Unity Center, 1383 S. 900 West, times vary, weekend performances through Sep 11. Tickets $17-20, utahrep.org
UPCOMING EVENTS
Sep. 10, 2016 Utah Pride Center Golf Classic, utahpridecenter.org
Sep. 20, 2016 Cyndi Lauper, smithstix.com
Sep. 22, 2016 Tegan and Sara, smithstix.com
Oct. 15, 2016 Ani DiFranco, smithstix.com